Friday, May 26, 2006

How do I reach an orgasm?

Is it OK to fake an Orgasm?

Is there something wrong with a woman that has not experienced an orgasm?

These are a couple of questions that I have been getting asked more and more, so I thought why not address them through my articles? As much as I have written this for my ladies, men you can benefit from reading this little bit of info also!

There is nothing physically wrong with women that have not experienced the big O! They simply just have not learned how. It is very much a mental exercise as well as physical. Way back when..., we were taught that it was a bad thing to touch ourselves (masturbate). That was a big wrong turn for a lot of women. I have read a lot of letters from women that tell me that they were in their late 20`s before they ever experienced an orgasm, one that they would consider an orgasm anyway. This is why I express over and over, ladies learn about YOUR BODY! Orgasms are very connected to ones mind when dealing with the female. If you are worried or tired or feeling a bit at odds with your partner, that door is definitely going to be locked, even nailed shut. It will take some work and patience to find the key to open up that mind trap.

Too many women spend way too much time worrying about orgasms. Worry only puts up the walls that will totally disable your mind to relax and float. Think of watching and waiting for water to boil. By the time it has boiled you have lost interest. Or when you are trying to call someone and the line is forever busy, that just frustrates you to no end. If you would have just carried on with something else at the time, the water would have boiled before you knew it, the phone line would be cleared, and you would be frustration free! Orgasms work in very much the same way. Do not think about them. Do prepare for them, feel your body call them, desire them, fantasize, open your mind up to a total zone of passion. Pure thoughtless passion!

Some women feel that if they do not orgasm, their partner will feel that they have failed them, or vice verse. (GUILT) There is absolutely no room for guilt or shyness in the arena of sex! This is one of the reasons women FAKE the O! It does not do any real physical harm to fake most things in life. The only one that is losing out though, is you. You are fooling no one but yourself. Then you end up feeling even worse because you pretended at a time when you should be open and real.

There is also the time thing. Women are in need of more stimulation and time to relax and be able to find their zone. Men tend to think that five minutes is just super...NOT...so ladies this is where communication comes into play. You must tell your man that NO, I am not there yet. I know this sounds bossy, but most men hardly ever have a problem telling the women what to do in bed and when to not stop. Also ladies please tell your man to do like the yellow pages commercial, "Let your fingers do the walking". Women like and need the finger play. Also ladies if your man is just down there asap...tell him to slow down. This can also throw women off when they are feeling rushed.

When you are close to your partner and feel that sex is in the air, enjoy even just the kiss at first. I mean really enjoy just the kiss. Allow your body to warm up and get your juices flowing. Or really feel his touches, and listen to your partners voice when he says your name. If he never says your name, tell him too. He will oblige immediately. Tell him you want to hear him admire your body. A women on the norm has a hard time verbalizing what she likes. This is just because we were raised to be nice girls. Well, TALK! You will be surprised at how much more relaxed you become and excited once you can talk to your partner about touching where and how. Tell your partner to join you in that little game. A women's body will react very nicely if you just allow the feelings of a kiss to penetrate you.

Another turn on for you ladies is to touch yourself while your partner watches. Yes, you will love it once you allow him into your world. He will not say no to that request. To see or hear how excited he gets watching you enjoying your body is another very big turn on for you. This is also a very good way to keep your mind away from the, "will I or won`t I" question. Think of anything but the ultimate O!

G-spot orgasms are pretty easy to reach. We can get there as easy as men have the ability to get hard. To get there just tell your man to do the, "walking". Or take his hand and guide him down to where your body is wanting his touch. G-Spot orgasms feel nice and they are basically our juice fountain, that is when we get very wet. This is when your body prepares for penetration.

It is the clitoral Orgasm that most women are after. Those ones will shake your ground. But again, these are mind connected. I will say I am speaking for the norm of women. Every women is different to a degree, but we are basically after the same thing. We all want to feel that intense vibration and the total body rush that runs through our body. It is an adrenaline rush like no other. To know we have that kind of control in our minds and bodies also boosts our self-esteem! That my Ladies is a very good thing!

Some women are sensitive enough that they will react instantly to a touch. That is not always that good. Her orgasm at that point will be quick and over before she even gets to really appreciate it. The longer it takes to reach that ,"O" Zone, the more intense the orgasm. That is another reason you want to learn to control your body. Eventually you will be able to tell your mind when and where!

A very, very good way to learn about your body is to bring yourself to orgasm. I tell women that all the time. You need to know and be able to connect with your own mind before you can allow someone to do it for you. Once you can learn to control your minds ability to fantasize or totally zone out, your body will follow naturally. Ladies again, it is so important to learn this because it keeps your mind off whether or not the O is going to happen. Once you have learned about your body, you will be able to bring that O on yourself just with your mind. A little hand stimulation is also your minds best friend here. You will know how much stimulation you will need at the time. You will eventually know your entire body`s secret passages to feeling. Yes! Very yummy. So my words here, are to get to know your secrets.. and HAVE FUN!

Remember Ladies, men are not born with your road map to orgasm. First you need to draw it for him. Then show it to him. From there it is totally the big," O" every time. This is my recipe to the one thing that women can do over and over again, without a rest period. Ha!! Sorry guys, we were born that way.

When modern woman discovered the orgasm, it was combined with modern birth control, perhaps the biggest single nail in the coffin of male dominance.

Eva Figes

Tips on Cunnilingus, Fellatio and Orgasms!

If you are wondering what I am going to share with you tonight, then you are definitely in need of this article, especially after reading my teaser up there. I have shared many of my thoughts with you during the past few months. Mostly about females why`s and woe`s. I have had many men request that I give them more information on exactly what women like in the sex, and feelings department.

OK, well I will do what I do best, just simply share what my thoughts on these subjects are. Take them or leave them!

There are so many sites out there that are about dating, relationships, how to score, how to win, and yet men are still looking for answers. Why is that? Maybe it`s because not every answer fits every women! That may be your first hint guys. We are all different, what works on one women will make another women slap your face with disgust. So I would think that a good thing to do is to just chat a bit with the lady and get to know the side of her that she is willing to show you. Hopefully you are smart enough to listen to her, and learn as she talks. Oh, and please save the checking out her boobs or her butt until after you have won the first battle.

I truly believe men are so quickly blinded by our physical protrusions (wink) that they immediately lose their focus at first base. Guys, the body parts are not going anywhere. Have some class and be patient. OK, enough about that very somber subject. I will leave that for another show, as they say.

Women's feelings, as most men have already experienced are nothing to joke about. Women are sensitive creatures and at the same time very strong. Those two characteristics are nothing short of explosive. The beneficial side to these hard to deal with emotions is that women are just as equally passionate and loving towards the male gender. It is our passion that fuels our desires to be wanted by men. We send off certain signals that entice and attract men. Women know exactly how to win a mans heart. Remember, we are the more sensitive feeling being, of the two genders. We also deal with hormones that turn us into monsters one minute and little tiny babies in another. Our feelings are usually on the top of our skin. That's why we get hurt so much easier than men. We are child bearers, and that instinctively causes us to be more cautious and rely on our intuitions more than facts. So guys , please forgive us for being the more feeling human. Do not hate us for it, or get frustrated with us, but love us and know that for all the pain we share, we also share twice as much pleasure. That brings me to my next thought!

Sex, that is definitely a good thought not to mention a very fun act between men and women. Women love to be touched, and felt. She wants to feel your hands on her body. It is a very important physical connection that sends messages to her most intimate senses. When a man touches a woman's body, she feels wanted, she feels lusted, she feels craved, but most of all she feels SEXY! Her self-esteem will ROAR! That my dear sweet men, is exactly the point you want her at. You want her to feel SEXY!

Women do vary with having their breasts played with. This should be done gently at first, so to not turn her off. Some women love a very passionate kiss. A passionate kiss can be an instant orgasm. Women love to feel the sensation of your breathe on thier skin. That will surely send her to a new level of sensations. Women have very sensitive backs. A women's spine will tingle with the slightest touch of your finger tips. Kiss her shoulders, please. Kiss her belly! Kiss her thighs, that is another very sweet spot for women! Kiss her between her legs! She will be warm already, anticipating the sensation of your tongue! It is a very sweet way to taste the women that you desire! She will feel that much more open to you, knowing that you want every part of her body! Women`s bodies have so many sensations that it does take them a bit more time to get them to have an orgasm. The more sensations that you can get a women to feel, the higher she will go into her orgasm zones. Spend time tasting her, never rush her. Also please no not wear out just one spot. Women know there good spots, ask her to tell you what feels good. Be patient though, women do have a harder time talking about sex. Listen to her moans, read her body language, feel her wetness. All these are signs being sent to you. That's a plus for you also. The more orgasmic a women feels, the more adventurous she will be when it is you she wants to devour.

Remember, to tell her how SEXY she is and how sweet she tastes! Let her know how good she feels to you. Let her know that she is driving you crazy. Women also love to know that for sure. When men are quiet during sex, women feel that they are not exciting or sexy. Women need to hear that men want them and want to please them. When women feel they are wanted, that in turn makes them want to please their man. HMMM! Where do you think my thoughts are going now??

MHM!! Women also love to please their men. They know that men crave fellatio, better know to most as ,"Blow-jobs". (SMilz) Yes guys we know, we know. Women read more that you can imagine how just how to give their guy the best BJ. There are just as many books out there and sites on the internet about that as there are about how to please a woman. My hint to all the women wondering out there is...PRACTICE!!!! Body language from your man is a must to watch for. Not all men are the same. Some men are more sensitive in some areas that others. Just as women are also on different levels of sensations when it comes to oral sex. Another good tip ladies is your thoughts at the time of the Bj. Think sex. Think wet.Think suction. Think warm. Think HIM!! Love him!! But most of all suck him like you want it. The more he feels that you are just absolutely crazy for it, the more intense it is for him. Do not be afraid of what you are doing. You cannot hurt him unless you bite. That's a NO! NO!.... DO NOT BITE or SCRAPE! :) Don`t be afraid to ask him how it feels, or if there is anything more you can do to please him.

Communication, as in anything, is important in sex. It is after all, something that we want to enjoy with one another. Also we learn more about each other through sharing our physical desires. Ladies another very huge turn on for your man is when he sees you feel SEXY! When a man sees his woman sexy, confident and open to him, it will totally send him over the edge of lust for you. So lets get SEXY!!

When all is said and done, Cuddles is a biggie. We need to cuddle. It reassures us that everything was perfect. It's kind of like the icing on the cake. It bonds us on another level of communication. Some women and men have their best conversations when they cuddle. It is almost like a surrender of weapons.

Well these are my thoughts on this. I hope I have not offended anyone. I know this is a different subject than what you are use to reading. But I am human also, just like you. Also I wanted to show a little attitude of a different color for my readers.

Enjoy life and enjoy all of it benefits.

Monday, May 22, 2006

Finding the G-Spot Everytime

You will learn here how to find the G-spot with your partner, and once finding it, use of a special sexual position to stimulate it, and bring her quickly to climax after climax (once you learn the technique).

To find the G-spot, you need to know what it is, where it is located, and how to identify it.

What is the G Spot

The G-spot is named after the German doctor (a gynecologist) Ernst Graftenburg.

It is an area inside the vagina, on its front wall.

When this area is stimulated with the correct pressure it often evokes an orgasm. You can locate it as it corresponds to the area where the urethra is nearest to the top of the vaginal wall. The urethra is the opening where a woman urinates.

Finding the G spot

There are several opinions to exactly where the G-spot is, and indeed it varies from woman to woman. You can be sure however that is somewhere from the urethral opening on to the termination of the vagina.

Using one or two fingers, insert them inside your partner's vagina, touching the top of the vaginal wall. You will feel a lattice-work of muscle tissue, and somewhere in that lattice is the real G-spot. Be very careful how you touch it. Too little pressure and your partner will feel nothing. Too much pressure and she will experience an unpleasant pain.

pleasuring the G Spot

Once you have located it, you have three methods to employ it to pleasure your partner.

The first method is while performing cunnilingus re-insert two fingers and apply a steady and firm (but not rough) pressure to the G-spot. After about 20 minutes of cunnilingus, and pressure, your partner should experience a steady and strong orgasm.

The second method is by intercourse, with the man laying on his back and woman mounted on top. The man needs do nothing at all, just have an erection and let the woman move and she will press her own G-spot against the man's penis. Orgasm is assured.

The third method is a sexual position known as Kneel and Heels. The woman lays on her back, with the man sitting on his thighs in front of her.

The woman will place her heels on the man's chest with her legs slightly apart. The man then penetrates the woman, and does not move or thrust, but rather leans back a bit, insuring his penis is firmly touching the vaginal wall.

The woman rather wiggles and undulates. The man's penis will be in an upward tilt and pressing against the G-spot. After some minutes, the woman will experience a strong orgasm, as the same position also stimulates the clitoris.

It must be remembered that to stimulate the G-spot one must apply both intense and constant local pressure in unison.

The man simply thrusting is not effective in this case. I

If the man can hold on long enough, his partner will experience an orgasm that is both deep and long-lasting.

An interesting variation in sexual position is known as the Horse position.

The woman is lying down on her back with the man standing. Again her heels are pressed to the man's chest, and he can penetrate and instead of trusting, he simply moves with his penis fully inserted into the vagina.

The experienced man can understand where the G-spot is, and a firm and constant pressure brings the desired result.


For more informative sexual articles, features and downloads please go to:
http://www.net-planet.org/sexhealth.html

Friday, May 19, 2006

Add Spark to Your Love Life with Sexy Costumes

If your love life is feeling routine and the spark is threatening to go out, breathe some fresh air into the mix by using sexy costumes. Whether you would like to admit it or not, everyone has a fantasy. For most guys the Farrah Fawcet in the red swimsuit fantasy is ranked right up there with the Princess Leia in the bikini fantasy. Of course, any occupation with the word "sexy" listed before it finishes out the trifecta of guy fantasies. These include sexy nurses, police officers, maids, flight attendants, pirates, and even a lunch lady is she's sexy enough!

Women on the other hand typically have fantasies about strong, capable men. Most women start drooling the moment they see anyone in uniform, including soldiers, sailors, police officers, fire fighters, or sports figures. However, women can become caught up in a fantasy that involves them dressing up in a provocative outfit just as easily as men. After all, why would any woman agree to wear a sexy costume if there wasn't something in it for her?

Wearing sexy costumes is nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about, as many couples exercise these play roles to keep their love life from becoming tired, listless, or dull. Just because you use sexy costumes in your relationship does not mean that you no longer want to be with your partner, which is a common misconception. Just because you have a desire to see your wife or girlfriend in a skimpy maid's outfit does not mean you have a secret wish to have sex with a maid. Instead, these fantasies allow us to cast ourselves and our loved one in a unique setting in order to experience something different. Think of it like Halloween, but instead of candy, you get something much more satisfying.

There are several different variations of sexy costumes that are available for purchase. If you are entering into the idea of fulfilling a fantasy for either yourself or your partner, you may be unwilling to purchase some of the more provocative costumes on the market. Consider starting out small by using accessories and accents to make a unique statement or choose a more subdued costume that is subtly sexy. Although there are only two people in a relationship, and you may have many years of history to fall back on, there can still be embarrassment present, so be sure to speak of any issues that may be of concern for either you or your partner.

Think of sexy costumes like lingerie or any other provocative clothing meant to get a rise out of your partner. When purchasing sexy costumes, you should be sure to choose a costume not only for its look, but also for its construction and materials. By purchasing a high quality costume, you can be sure that your partner will be able to enjoy his or her fantasy for many, many years to come. Most often, the fantasy wears out before the costume!

In addition to wearing a sexy costume to keep your sex life jumping, consider using different areas in your home for those intimate moments. A scantily clad maid is far more convincing on the kitchen table than in the bed. Furthermore, that muscle-clad mechanic will be a good deal more enjoyable in your garage to keep the fantasy realistic. Keep in mind that sexy costumes differ from person to person. What you consider sexy is probably different that what your friends consider sexy, but fantasies are unique to each individual. Be sure to support your partner with whatever fantasy tickles his or her boat and enjoy the ride!


Christianna Mansfield is the owner of Lingerie Obsessions. Offering Sexy Costumes and Lingerie for women of all sizes

Monday, May 08, 2006

10 Hot Tips to Make Your Romance Sizzle

Copyright 2006 21erotic.com

Is your romance with that special someone cooling off? Do you worry that the spark is going to go out? Look no further. Here are 15 hot tips to make your romance sizzle.

1. Use edible pain to create masterpieces on each other's bodies. If you don't have or can't find edible paint, use chocolate syrup or whip cream.

2. If you are looking for action later in the evening, eat a light dinner for a better ability to perform.

3. Create a fantasy box. Cover an old shoe box with white paper and use markers to paint some romantic scenes or hearts on it. You and your partner should write fantasies on slips of paper and put them in the box. When you are both in the mood, draw out a fantasy and make it into a reality.

4. Have your partner close their eyes, or blindfold them and then experiment with sensations. Use a feather, aromatherapy oils or ice to enhance their pleasure. Rub their lips with ice until they are cold and then kiss them with your warm lips. This is very erotic.

5. Go a little crazy and plan a sexual adventure. Make a date when each of you comes prepared for a sexual fantasy. You can dress in costumes or use sex toys to spark the enthusiasm.

6. Set the mood. Use aromatherapy candles and romantic music, or dim the lights and spend time together sipping a glass of wine. Fireplaces are romantic as well. Light a fire and cuddle up on it with your partner and then seek out all of those pleasure spots. Making love before a fire is very romantic.

7. Ladies can wear sexy lingerie - not. Go out to dinner and tell your partner about your bare essentials. If you can give him a peek without allowing others a glimpse, use the situation to your advantage.

8. Put a drop of edible oil in your partner's favorite flavor someplace on your body that you know they will lick. This gives a pleasant surprise and stimulates sensitivity.

9. Take your partner shopping...for sex toys. If you are embarrassed to go into a sex toy shop, do your erotica shopping online. There are a wide variety of sites that offer sex toys that will add romance to any couple's life.

10. Experiment with a vibrator. Each person can use it on the other to find those "pleasure spots." Once you find them, return to them time after time for a sensual lovemaking experience.

Author Info:

For more erotic articles visited http://www.21erotic.com

Sex Secrets Exposed: Multiple Orgasms

The majority of women who have experienced both kinds of orgasms claim that it is easier to have multiple G-spot orgasms than it is to have multiple clitoral orgasms. If an orgasm turns its lovely head towards you while the two of you two are playing with each other try the following. Try whispering some words of encouragement (and perhaps turn up the heat just a little bit), but basically continue pleasuring her through her orgasm.

Then continue and you will possible go right into a next one. If it still keeps feeling good for both of you, what's the point of stopping now? There is often a chain reaction with multiple G-spot orgasms coming one after another. Every one makes the next one feel even better, and makes most anything else sexual feel much better too.

However, as stated earlier everybody different, and the quality is far more important than the quantity.

It is true however that for some women playing with the G-Spot may become more likely to result in orgasm over a little period of time. Usually a few weeks or months after first starting to experiment with it. It is also very true that the intensity of orgasms may be directly related to pubococcygeal muscle tone This is another incentive for doing regular PC muscle exercises.

If you are a woman and you would like to try stimulating your G-Spot while masturbating try this. Use a good combination of toys. Most women would use a vibrator which can be used on your clit as you're getting warmed up as well as penetration.

In general it is not a very good idea to have a huge ego or emotional stake in having or giving your partner orgasms or multiple orgasms. Many sex educators believe it is not good to get "goal oriented" about something that's supposed to be for pleasure.
Author Info:

Terry Brazil Sex Secrets Exposed http://sex-god-secrets.blogspot.com

Spiritual and Sexual Healing

Spiritual Healing Through Sexuality



Alma De la Cruz

Couple issues such as spirituality and sexuality rank higher than financial reasons as the most affected items of a fumbling relationship. When it comes the moment to point out why a couple needs more intimate vigor, two wrongly things are sure to happen: Women are always blamed, and if both recognize that it’s a male matter, also women blame themselves. Their consequent silent follows a behavior that will never end the cycle if there is no communication and willingness to solve it.

I agree on communicative practices within the pair for finding a reconstructive way, if that is what both desire. But I also propose to call upon the Angels of relationships to ask for help, guidance, assistance and healing in this realm.

It’s just a matter of concentrating in the voice within to open your self into greater receptivity to their assistance. Practice this for a few minutes daily as you release all your thoughts and feelings. Simply place the relationship in the hands of your Angels and let go.

With your trust in Angels, your beau is also being helped. Spirituality within a couple is all about the union of mind, body and soul. It’s the inner joy that reflects the pleasure of having one another.

After you have passed this first step through the pathways to achieve sexual healing, both must concentrate on “the” issue, the rebirth of sexuality life. Surely, answers on this matter lay on natural remedies: aphrodisiacs.

Herb properties influence people’s sexual attraction. However, few people know that herbs are stimulants. The Santoreggia, for example, is considered one of the most well-known aphrodisiacal herbs that turn on imagination, and reinforce and tone many nerves and muscles, increasing sexual interest. On the other hand, a person that feels unable to be sexual and spiritual at the same time is in urgent need of any presentation of Basil.

Knowing this, kitchens ratify their functions as the best allies of women in the solving of “the situation” by transforming themselves into nests of potions which stimulate and increase the art of love in those people who no longer posses enough erotic spur. Then, you may add five drops of Santoreggia essence on a sugar cube 4 or 5 times a day to stimulate relationships.

The correct use of nature's products, and especially the gastronomic patrimony combined with a pinch of magic ritual, is the right ingredient at the right time: On Friday nights, according to Wiccan tradition.

Some herbs that help sexuality within couples are:

St. John’s Wort
This herb is widely used to help lift a low mood and it is often suggested to boost a flagging sex drive in those feeling blue

Potency Wood
This herb is widely used by natives of the Amazon and Orinoco river basins to enhance sexual desire and combat impotence

Ginseng
This herb is often taken as a tonic for increased vitality and libido enhancement

Yohimbe
It helps to repair erection problems by increasing penile blood flow

Hops
If premature ejaculation or impotence is a concern, this herb can assist any neurosis that might be a factor in these dysfunctions manifesting

Maca
Peruvian doctors have been known to give this herb to male patients who complain of having erection difficulties

Cocoa
This food/herb is known as the 'pleasure herb'

Privet
The boiled extract of this herb can be used as a douche for vaginal irritations

False Unicorn
It generally promotes fertility in both males and females

It is necessary to fully understand their properties and their correct way of preparation in order to avoid distasteful results. It is therefore necessary to carefully examine the causes of sufferers of sexual problems in order to choose correctly.

And remember: Communicate with one another! Talk to have great sex!

About The Author
Alma De la Cruz, a staff mystic employed by http://www.psychicrealm.com, has a profound personal history where she has unabashedly delved deep into the heart of occult mysteries for an extensive period of her life. Her name literally means “Soul of the Cross” in Spanish. Currently she is working publishing a manuscript that delves into the mysteries of Hispanic new age beliefs incorporating old insights with new spiritual methodologies.


Check out her bi weekly metaphysical column: http://www.newagenotebook.com where she takes a new twist, incorporating Latin shamanistic philosophies with leading edge occult beliefs.

Rejuvenating Sex And Health Naturally

Our physical and psychological makeup is influenced by the sexual imperative far more than most of us realize or wish to admit. Entire systems of psychoanalytical therapy (e.g. Freud) are based upon the premise that we are primarily sexual creatures.

Behaviorally, there is little doubt that there are dramatic differences between the sexes. This can be seen even in the earliest of years. (This is so in spite of vigilant efforts by “rights” groups to blur distinctions and to declare sexual equality by legal fiat.) Girls with dolls and boys with trucks and guns manifest with no coaching from parents, and reflect the natural nurturing tendencies of girls versus the more aggressive and protecting inclination of boys. Physically the primary and secondary sexual characteristics are obviously different. These features, in fact, attract the opposite sex and prepare each sex for reproduction, caregiving and protection for the young.

But sex is not just about recreation or procreation. It can directly impact health. For example, the risk of breast cancer is directly linked to childbearing and nursing in women – having children and nursing them for extended periods of time decreases the number of ovulations a woman has and thus decreases the pro-cancerous estrogen surges. Other research has demonstrated that fulfilling sexual activity in women is also linked to health.

A man’s sense of strength, perception of attractiveness to women, feelings of being loved and depended upon, financial success, respect, and feeling accepted are all intricately tied to sexuality. Male sexual self-worth goes hand-in-hand with physical and mental health.

Who primarily commits violent crime in society? Is it not young men in the heyday of their testosterone surge? Sexuality and health at their peak create the potential for either great accomplishment or great harm depending upon how these energies are focused.

On the other hand, when male hormone levels start to ebb in later years, health decline parallels this downturn. Men experience loss of muscle mass, lowered energy levels, decreased immunity, increased susceptibility to a variety of degenerative diseases, decreased libido and fertility, and various degrees of impotence. Sensing this decline, men can feel hopeless, worthless and at the end of life. Such feelings further fuel the downward health spiral often resulting in an early death.

The importance of sexuality in men is evidenced by polls showing that men would sooner risk serious life-threatening side effects than forego the possibility that a new drug (e.g. Viagra™) might rejuvenate them sexually. Being sexually alive even in the very oldest of men may be as important as life itself.

Although male hormone levels decrease with age, the slope of the curve can be dramatically altered. It will not, however, be just a matter of taking a pill. Supplemental male hormones are available but their use disrupts the body’s natural balances and can cause negative feedback inhibition. When this occurs, exogenous hormones (pills) send a signal to hormone-producing tissues that hormone levels are high enough. Endogenous (from the body itself) production therefore slows. Over time this can weaken hormone-producing tissues so that the initial problem of inadequate production is compounded. This is at least part of the mechanism for the adverse effects of anabolic (male hormone-like) steroids taken by athletes and bodybuilders. Young men eager to exaggerate muscularity end up with withered and weakened testicles and other endocrine glands setting them up for serious diseases as they get older.

A better alternative is to make healthy lifestyle changes (suggested in the Optimal Health Program™ http://www.wysong.net/optimal_health_page1.shtml) combined with natural nutritional supplementation, which has been proven to provide benefit to many.

Androgenic phytonutrients from herbs (such as Tribulus terrestris, Muira puama, Avena sativa and nettle leaf), amino acids (including L-arginine) and certain foods such as melons naturally increase testosterone production without the danger of negative feedback inhibition as experienced with anabolic steroids and other hormones. Increased testosterone levels, in turn, increase libido, act as an aphrodisiac and help prevent impotence. (In fact, modern research has revealed that testosterone is the only substance capable of generating libido in both men and women.)

Recent studies suggest that these phytonutrients also affect brain chemicals such that potency and erectile capacity are improved and male reproductive system growth, function, and repair is enhanced.

Phytonutrients can also improve sexual function through inhibiting the binding of sex hormone-binding globulin to its receptor site on prostatic membranes. This provides relief to benign prostatic hyperplasia (BPH) sufferers who often experience painful intercourse, a certain impediment to sexuality.

Other nutrients such as zinc, vitamin B12 and vitamin C directly stimulate sperm production and motility and thus increase fertility. Modern, processed, food fraction-based dietary fare can be woefully deficient in these nutrients. Selecting good supplements and converting the diet to more natural, fresh and varied foods is the solution.

Lifestyle changes (outlined in the Optimal Health Program™ http://www.wysong.net/optimal_health_page1.shtml) – not the least of which is maintaining healthy body weight and regularly exercising – when combined with proper nutrition can rejuvenate the entire body and with that send a signal to the sexual core of our biological being that we are alive and well. Such signals stimulate a natural invigoration of sexuality, and with that mental and physical health.

Author Info:

Dr. Wysong: A former veterinary clinician and surgeon, college instructor, inventor, research director for the company by his name and founder of the philanthropic Wysong Institute. http://www.cerealwysong.com.

Friday, May 05, 2006

Readers of Romance Novels Have Better Sex Lives

According to BusinessWeek, every 5 seconds someone buys a romance novel. For those more mathematically inclined—that makes romance novels a $1.2 billion dollar a year industry.

And it’s no wonder.

Experts agree that readers of romance novels find it easier to “get in the mood” and on average, even have sex with their partners more often. Psychology Today states that women who read romance novels make love with their partners 74% more often than women who don’t. Why? Because, according to a scientific study conducted by Harold Leitenberg of the The Journal of Sex Research and Psychological Bulletin, when women fantasize frequently (as they do when they read romance novels), they have sex more often, have more fun in bed, and engage in a wider variety of erotic activities.

Many therapists now go so far as to recommend reading steamy romance stories to boost a woman’s sex drive. Their reasoning: “taking part in enjoyable activities such as walking with a partner, listening to music, having a glass of wine, taking a bath, or reading a romance novel can help put women in the mood for sex. These activities can help women shift into their "sex self" from their role as mother, wife, employer, or employee,” says Carol Rinkleib Ellison, PhD, a psychologist and author of Women's Sexualities. Christiane Northrup, M.D. of Women’s Health Wisdom also says: “Consider reading novels or renting movies that contain sexual content to help you get in the mood.”

For those of us that enjoy a steamy romance novel on a regular basis—this is not new news. We’ve been trying to tell mainstream nay-sayers this all along. We women are turned on by “emotional stimulation” the way men are aroused visually. Though more and more romance authors are leaning toward more erotic romance, women don’t always require graphic sex scenes to become aroused. After reading an emotionally intense love scene, a woman feels more open to the “idea” of making love—or “in the mood” for sex.

Maria Veloso, author of Midwinter Turns to Spring states, “Contrary to popular belief, the ability of romance novels to fuel a woman’s sexual desire doesn’t lie in the stereotypical bodice-ripping, sexually explicit scenes so inherent in romance novels – but rather in the realm of emotions. In most cases, a woman’s libido is directly linked to emotions that revolve around romance and love. These emotions are a connected set of processes that involve physiological changes, such as heart rate, blood pressure and hormones circulating throughout the body—and these comprise the cornerstones of a woman’s sexual drive. Therefore, when a woman’s emotions are stirred by a romance novel, that’s a recipe for an emotional aphrodisiac. It’s like giving a woman emotional foreplay.”

She goes on to say that “when women read romance novels, their emotions are stirred. Because a woman's emotions are directly linked to their libido, romance novels then virtually become aphrodisiac cocktails – or what I call emotional foreplay for women. And that's a prelude to sex.”

Just as men become aroused while perusing nude magazines, women stimulate their emotional and their libido while reading a satisfying love scene. Some critics of either men’s magazine or steamy romance novels may doubt this activity as an acceptable alternate for couples in a committed relationship for bettering a person’s sex life. Some may believe these habits may actually take away that special something from a sexual relationship rather than enhance it. Based on this current scientific studies, this is, thankfully, not the case.

Women’s sex lives and the level of intimacy they have with their husbands, boyfriends or partners will show a noticeable improvement after reading a romance novel because it simply puts them in a more romantic state of mind.

So what’s the link between romance novel and better sex lives?

Emotional satisfaction.

That’s something to think about when you’re at the counter trying to decide between this month’s Cosmo and the latest steamy romance novel!!!

Bonnie Louise Williams is the author of three erotic romance novels, an online romantic comedy series, and several erotic short stories. To join her free newsletter visit her website at http://www.LoveandRomanceEtc.com or to order Bonnie’s erotic romance novels, visit www.BonnieLouiseWilliams.com.

Thursday, May 04, 2006

How do I reach an orgasm?

Is it OK to fake an Orgasm?

Is there something wrong with a woman that has not experienced an orgasm?

These are a couple of questions that I have been getting asked more and more, so I thought why not address them through my articles? As much as I have written this for my ladies, men you can benefit from reading this little bit of info also!

There is nothing physically wrong with women that have not experienced the big O! They simply just have not learned how. It is very much a mental exercise as well as physical. Way back when..., we were taught that it was a bad thing to touch ourselves (masturbate). That was a big wrong turn for a lot of women. I have read a lot of letters from women that tell me that they were in their late 20`s before they ever experienced an orgasm, one that they would consider an orgasm anyway. This is why I express over and over, ladies learn about YOUR BODY! Orgasms are very connected to ones mind when dealing with the female. If you are worried or tired or feeling a bit at odds with your partner, that door is definitely going to be locked, even nailed shut. It will take some work and patience to find the key to open up that mind trap.

Too many women spend way too much time worrying about orgasms. Worry only puts up the walls that will totally disable your mind to relax and float. Think of watching and waiting for water to boil. By the time it has boiled you have lost interest. Or when you are trying to call someone and the line is forever busy, that just frustrates you to no end. If you would have just carried on with something else at the time, the water would have boiled before you knew it, the phone line would be cleared, and you would be frustration free! Orgasms work in very much the same way. Do not think about them. Do prepare for them, feel your body call them, desire them, fantasize, open your mind up to a total zone of passion. Pure thoughtless passion!

Some women feel that if they do not orgasm, their partner will feel that they have failed them, or vice verse. (GUILT) There is absolutely no room for guilt or shyness in the arena of sex! This is one of the reasons women FAKE the O! It does not do any real physical harm to fake most things in life. The only one that is losing out though, is you. You are fooling no one but yourself. Then you end up feeling even worse because you pretended at a time when you should be open and real.

There is also the time thing. Women are in need of more stimulation and time to relax and be able to find their zone. Men tend to think that five minutes is just super...NOT...so ladies this is where communication comes into play. You must tell your man that NO, I am not there yet. I know this sounds bossy, but most men hardly ever have a problem telling the women what to do in bed and when to not stop. Also ladies please tell your man to do like the yellow pages commercial, "Let your fingers do the walking". Women like and need the finger play. Also ladies if your man is just down there asap...tell him to slow down. This can also throw women off when they are feeling rushed.

When you are close to your partner and feel that sex is in the air, enjoy even just the kiss at first. I mean really enjoy just the kiss. Allow your body to warm up and get your juices flowing. Or really feel his touches, and listen to your partners voice when he says your name. If he never says your name, tell him too. He will oblige immediately. Tell him you want to hear him admire your body. A women on the norm has a hard time verbalizing what she likes. This is just because we were raised to be nice girls. Well, TALK! You will be surprised at how much more relaxed you become and excited once you can talk to your partner about touching where and how. Tell your partner to join you in that little game. A women's body will react very nicely if you just allow the feelings of a kiss to penetrate you.

Another turn on for you ladies is to touch yourself while your partner watches. Yes, you will love it once you allow him into your world. He will not say no to that request. To see or hear how excited he gets watching you enjoying your body is another very big turn on for you. This is also a very good way to keep your mind away from the, "will I or won`t I" question. Think of anything but the ultimate O!

G-spot orgasms are pretty easy to reach. We can get there as easy as men have the ability to get hard. To get there just tell your man to do the, "walking". Or take his hand and guide him down to where your body is wanting his touch. G-Spot orgasms feel nice and they are basically our juice fountain, that is when we get very wet. This is when your body prepares for penetration.

It is the clitoral Orgasm that most women are after. Those ones will shake your ground. But again, these are mind connected. I will say I am speaking for the norm of women. Every women is different to a degree, but we are basically after the same thing. We all want to feel that intense vibration and the total body rush that runs through our body. It is an adrenaline rush like no other. To know we have that kind of control in our minds and bodies also boosts our self-esteem! That my Ladies is a very good thing!

Some women are sensitive enough that they will react instantly to a touch. That is not always that good. Her orgasm at that point will be quick and over before she even gets to really appreciate it. The longer it takes to reach that ,"O" Zone, the more intense the orgasm. That is another reason you want to learn to control your body. Eventually you will be able to tell your mind when and where!

A very, very good way to learn about your body is to bring yourself to orgasm. I tell women that all the time. You need to know and be able to connect with your own mind before you can allow someone to do it for you. Once you can learn to control your minds ability to fantasize or totally zone out, your body will follow naturally. Ladies again, it is so important to learn this because it keeps your mind off whether or not the O is going to happen. Once you have learned about your body, you will be able to bring that O on yourself just with your mind. A little hand stimulation is also your minds best friend here. You will know how much stimulation you will need at the time. You will eventually know your entire body`s secret passages to feeling. Yes! Very yummy. So my words here, are to get to know your secrets.. and HAVE FUN!

Remember Ladies, men are not born with your road map to orgasm. First you need to draw it for him. Then show it to him. From there it is totally the big," O" every time. This is my recipe to the one thing that women can do over and over again, without a rest period. Ha!! Sorry guys, we were born that way.

Monday, May 01, 2006

Doggy Style Sex Positions

Here are more additions to our continuing series on sex positions. Today, we are exploring variations of the doggy style position. Many men find this one of the most exciting positions.

Leapfrog Sex Position has the penetrating partner inserting from behind. The receiving partner on all fours, facing down.

Leapfrog Variantion on the doggy sex position has the receiving partner's torso lower, also known as "face down ass up".

Froggy Style variant on leapfrog position with the penetrating partner raising their own hips above those of the receiving partner for maximum penetration.

Upright doggy is variant on the doggy position. The receiving partner kneels upright.

Spread-eagle has the receiving partner laying face down, with legs spread open, while penetrating partner is on top. Also known as the spider position.

Spoons position has both partners lying on their same side facing in the same direction as the penetrating partner inserts from behind.

Reverse Peace Sign has the receiving partner laying face down with knees held together.

Inverted Missionary has the receiver laying face down on surface with legs spread/closed, and penetrating partner enters receiving partner while she/he lies on stomach (provides good stimulation of the penetrator's testicles, penetrator can reach around and stimulate the clitoris/testicles of the receiver)

Camel Ride/Camel-Style has the receiving partner laying on his/her side with the uppermost leg forward. The penetrating partner kneels over the receiver's leg, gaining access to either vagina or anus. Good for sex during pregnancy, or for overweight partners.

Woman On Top Sex Positions

The woman on top sex positions, often called Cowgirl or Amazon sex position. With these sex positions, the penetrating partner lies on his or her back and the receiving partner sits on top of the penetrator facing the penetrator's face. The receiving partner often stimulates the penetrating partner's genitals by reaching behind them.

Reverse Amazon Sex Position has the penetrating partner laying on their back with the receiving partner sits on top of the penetrator facing AWAY from them. The receiving partner may stimulate the penetrating partner's genitals from this position. Another advantage is that the penetrating partner may view the receiving partner's back, which some find to be an erotic stimulus.

Italian Chandelier sex position variantion on the above position puts the receiving partner on top, arching her back and placing her hands on the ground, with the penetrating partner on bottom.

Reverse Cowgirl Horizontal places the penetrating partner on their back. The receiving partner first sits on top of the penetrator facing AWAY from them, and then lies down on top of the penetrating partner.

Asian Cowgirl has the penetrating partner lies on their back and the receiving partner squats (not kneels) on top of the penetrator facing toward them.

Horizontal Reverse Woman on top sex position variantion on the above position puts the receiving partner on top facing down with torso lower with the penetrating partner on bottom.

Full Control Woman on Top works well if the penetrating partner's waist is sufficiently slim. The receiving partner (while the penetrating partner is fully inserted and their back arched) can bring their knees under their partner's back, thus providing the penetrator support. The penetrating partner in this position is essentially immobile, and the receiver fully controls the intercourse. The intercourse then continues by the receiver leaning backwards and pushing against the penetrator.